For Peace Sake

This was a popular refrain in my father’s house. When my step-mother and I would erupt in some senseless argument, my father would pull me aside, and say, “Damali, for peace sake….” These words were always followed by some middle-of-the-road compromise to appease my step-mother. As a teenager, I thought what a ridiculous way to live, to have to hold your tongue, walk on egg shells, and tip toe around some unrelenting person not mature enough to see their contribution to the problem. As a woman, I have toned my thoughts down a bit, but, when it comes to abuse and violence, I stand in truth and won’t be silenced For Peace Sake. Too many victims are asked/encouraged/forced into silence and recantation because someone in their community/family thought it would be best For Peace Sake – especially if the accused perpetrator is a public figure, celebrity, or in some position of authority. As I write this the Steubenville rape case is front and center in my mind. This victim, who “allegedly” was urinated on, raped by more than one person, and caught on camera being carried by her arms and legs, is being vilified because this case shines a bad light on the city, football team, and players. Give me a break! To pretty up di ting dem wan har back off an appease dem (translation – to make the situation look better, they want her to back off and appease them)…For Peace Sake. If she does that, what will become of her? What of her dignity? What about her peace of mind? If she backs down due to intimidation, how will she live with herself? I suspect that will only add to the trauma of being violated and dim her light further, until her candle burns out completely. It is my hope that she will stand in her truth even if it causes an uproar in Steubenville.

Karen and I will talk more about this case and the alternatives to silence For Peace Sake tomorrow on Ennufff. Please join us.