This is a brief story of my living in obscurity – trying my best in all manner of the word obscure. My first struggle was my sense of who I was. Where I felt I belonged was so painful [for me] it left me insecure, with shame to keep myself in the shadows. Despite my strong personality and adversities, in the past, my sense of belonging led to my seeking a family and acceptance in all the wrong places, living among so called “respectable people” in society who were my caregivers. Then entering early marriage as a young girl, and starting a family when I had no idea what I was doing. However, the thought of having my own family began with three beautiful daughters.
The second was my relationship with my mother. I struggled with it for many years – I misunderstood her, I mothered her, and finally had to release her. The family dynamics and the brokenness left a lot of us alone from different backgrounds to face the same situation, and that is child sexual molestation, rape, and abuse. My broken family left me desolate, abandoned, and poverty stricken. My family was poor and the help of strangers was my rescue. I felt ashamed of my poverty and the disadvantages that came with it. Everyone assumed I was okay, but more on that will be in my book currently being edited.